In an unexpected turn of trans-Tasman events, Australian officials — none of whom exist — have proposed a bold new initiative: making New Zealand the 7th and final state of Australia. The move, inspired by a slightly louder American campaign to absorb Canada as its 51st state, is being described by experts as “either a drunken idea from a Melbourne pub, or the finest satire since The Castle.”

Australia has welcomed almost two million migrants in the past decade, yet housing affordability and wages are in crisis. While families are left struggling to find shelter and fair pay, real estate agents and big business profit from a system that rewards exploitation over community wellbeing.

Australia’s future will be shaped not by distant alliances but by the realities of our own region. For too long, we have tied ourselves to Washington’s strategic fears, most recently through the costly and outdated AUKUS submarine deal. At over $360 billion, AUKUS locks us into dependence on the United States and Britain while doing little to secure our nation in an era when autonomous systems and advanced technologies define modern defence.

The real choice facing Australia is clear. We can cling to a declining America, which hides inequality and social control behind the rhetoric of “freedom”, or we can embrace our place in the Asia Pacific by working with China, our largest trading partner and a nation that has lifted millions out of poverty while building infrastructure across continents.

Western narratives about “reds under the bed”, about Taiwan as a spark for World War III, and about American moral superiority are propaganda designed to serve oligarchs and arms dealers. Chinese people, by contrast, have proved time and again to be generous, trustworthy, and valuable partners.

China is not our enemy. China is our friend. For Australia, the path to peace, prosperity, and independence lies not across the Pacific but with our neighbours in Asia.